More to be Pitied than Censured
by King in Yellow
Summary: Judy suffers through her worst assignment (so far) in the ZPD without the help of Nick. But Duke Weaselton turns up to offer unwelcome salvation. Nick tries to provide comfort, which Judy writes off as epic fail. (Maybe not epic fail. But she'll insist she could do it better, and he will assign her the job.) Another story in the Who Do You Trust continuity.
1. Ain't No Rest for the Wicked

Boilerplate Disclaimer: The various characters from the movie Zootopia are all owned by Disney the great and powerful. All registered trade names property of their respective owners. Cheap shots at celebrities constitute fair usage.

Roughed out seven chapters for another story set in the Potter universe (with no Harry). If the school has existed for centuries I figure there are a lot of stories from before Harry was ever born. Anyway, having finished the rough draft of that, I hacked out the first of two chapters for this.

"More to be Pitied than Censured", a sloppy sentimental ballad from 1894.

 _Do not scorn her with words fierce and bitter_  
 _Do not laugh at her shame and downfall_  
 _For a moment stop and consider_  
 _That a man was the cause of it all._

"Ain't No Rest for the Wicked" by Cage the Elephant, 2008.

 **Ain't No Rest for the Wicked  
**

Half-asleep Nick reached out, and panicked briefly when Judy wasn't in bed with him. Of course she wasn't. He had told her he had too much work to do last night. She'd offered to stay out of the way, but he knew he'd never have been able to finish what he needed for today with her at his apartment. He smiled as he got back to sleep. He'd tell her when he got to the station. She'd be amused. It was amazing, and frightening, and wonderful how fast their relationship was progressing. Only months earlier he could not have imagined being in a relationship with a rabbit, now he suffered an anxiety attack when he woke up and she wasn't with him.

Ben Clawhauser waved with unusual vigor as Judy entered the First and the rabbit went over to ask about the source of his excitement.

"Nick came early today. He has a cup of good coffee and a croissant for you."

"Are you sure?"

"That the coffee and croissant were for you? Who else?"

"That it was Nick. He's got a fundamental principle never to arrive early."

"He loves you."

"Maybe it wasn't Nick. I'll bet it was Rick!"

"Don't do that to me, Judy. You two almost made my head explode."

"Sorry," the bunny laughed.

"Oh, before you go, how's your sister doing?"

"Suze it finding it harder than expected. She coasted to top grades in Bunnyburrow, but she has to work hard at Zoo U the classes are filled with other animals who were the top at their schools. Ernie... Did you meet Ernie?"

"He's that weasel from Bunnyburrow who's in the Academy?"

"Yes. He knows how to work hard."

"You really think he'll make it through?"

"I know a rabbit who made it through by working hard. Gotta go, I hear I have coffee getting cold."

Nick was leaning back in his chair, feet up on the desk in violation of several unofficial rules for detective behavior. "You're late!"

"Ben stopped me to say you had coffee for me. Then he asked about Suze."

"Think he'll work up the nerve to ask her out?"

"He's too old for her."

"And would have to stand in line behind Terry and Ernie."

"And she's not interested in either of them romantically. She's not interested in an interspecies romance."

"As I recall her older sister was against the idea when she moved to Zootopia."

"Yeah, and look at what happened to her! She fell for a fox! Of all animals, a fox!"

"I heard he brought her coffee and a croissant today."

"And she's pretty sure she'll keep–"

" **Feet off the desk, fox!** "

Nick managed to spill coffee on his shirt in his haste to get his feet on the floor. The panther just chuckled.

"Not funny, Nyte."

"I think it's hilarious. Hey, you heard Judy's working with me and Hairus today while you have your planning session with the mouse, right?"

"Doc Wheeler is a hamster."

"Whatever. Good chance she'll save a life today."

"How so?" asked Judy.

"Because I'll have another sane animal to work with. I swear, I'm not sure if that bear will retire first or I'll kill him. John patrol with him stinks."

Nick suggested, "Might just be a lack of personal hygiene."

"Yeah, that too. I want to take Judy down to get dressed for the assignment."

"Can I ask serious question first," Nick requested.

"A serious question? You? Me?"

"Hey, you hate my guts so you won't try and sugar coat your answer."

"I don't hate your guts. Neck up, I hate. Below the neck you're a regular officer."

"Below the neck he's mine," Judy reminded the panther.

"At least below the belt," chuckled Nyte.

"I... I... That..." the embarrassed rabbit stuttered. "Not what I meant."

"And, speaking of male anatomy–"

"I wasn't speaking of male anatomy!"

"Thanks again for encouraging George to ask me out."

"No need. I'm just glad you and Officer Bagheera get along so well."

"We get along great," purred Nyte. "Can't wait until he gets a schedule that works better with mine."

Nick mused, "Will any of us know what to do with a happy Detective Nyte? What will it mean to the bullpen?"

"Maybe I won't yell so loudly at idiots with their feet up on their desks."

"I'd like to hear how you yell at the idiots," Nick nodded solemnly. "I mean, you yell so loud at me I worry you may bust a vocal cord. Not that there's anything wrong with that. Must leave the idiots deaf. But I had a serious question, maybe two. What do you think of the proposal of having smalls on the force? Do you think it's going to happen?"

The panther sighed and looked thoughtful. "Honestly," she told him, "I've got mixed feelings. I can see ways in which it would be help. Forensics work in the field? I'd love to work with a small team. You really think the smalls would allow the police in Rodentia?"

"I asked what you thought of the idea, and if you thought it could happen."

"Okay, on theoretical level I'm in favor of it. Reality? I don't think it'll happen in our lifetimes. No way the smalls will accept... Okay, a lot of smalls would love it. But you'd have to sell the bosses and I don't see that happening. And then you would have to sell it to the politicians, and they're afraid of real change. Rumor around the First is you're working hard on this. Don't knock yourself out. It ain't going to happen."

"But on a theoretical level you think it's good?"

"Yeah. Like my opinion counts. On your feet, Judy, bring the coffee with you, you need to get you dressed for the sting."

Twenty minutes later Judy looked at her image in the mirror. "It's so... so..."

"Cheap and tacky?" The rabbit nodded. "You imagined something glamorous?"

"Well, not exactly glamorous, but better than–"

"Prostitution is nothing like television and the movies," the panther spat. "Those are male fantasies where the females enjoy it. These are poor, desperate females who don't want to be turning tricks. They're being exploited. I've got sympathy for the hookers. The johns and the pimps? No sympathy at all."

"Did you really put two pimps in the hospital?"

"Just one. Other was treated at a clinic and jailed. Both were resisting arrest. The one who ended up in the hospital was armed... Internal Affairs suggested I 'voluntarily' attend a couple anger management sessions." The panther laughed, "Psychologist running the sessions was a female. She told me afterward she thought I managed my anger just fine. Don't know if the rumor of putting two in the hospital was good or bad."

"What do you mean?"

"Last pimp I cornered? Dropped to the ground on his belly, crossed his arms behind his back and begged me not to hurt him. I think he pissed his pants. Hairus wouldn't even let me slap the cuffs on him – said I might get charged with brutality or something... He's a lazy bastard, but he's a good officer. Don't know why he didn't retire. He's past old enough."

"Maybe he wants keep another good officer out of trouble."

"Nah, we irritate the hell out of each other. Maybe the aggravation keeps his blood pressure up so he doesn't just fall asleep and never wake up."

As she rode out to Clover Avenue in with the two large detectives they reviewed the rabbit's assignment.

"Squad cars have been up and down Clover, so the real hookers have moved out of the neighborhood – for now. What is the one thing you don't do?"

"The one thing I don't do or the one I don't say?"

"Sorry. Give me both."

"I don't initiate any conversation on sex. Maybe it's someone from out-of-town just wants directions. And I never get in a vehicle with anyone."

"Right on both. We'll pick up any conversation on the wire and have a record for the courts. And the reason you give for not getting in a vehicle?"

"Squad cars sometimes pass by and might see us. They need to drive around the block and I'll meet them at the parking lot of the old brass foundry."

"Okay, Hairus and I are both close and will respond immediately if anyone gives you trouble. I'll respond immediately. He'll probably be playing solitaire on his cell phone and–"

"Not funny," the bear growled.

"Lylah?" Judy asked.

"Yes?"

"You ever done this, took the part of the hooker?"

"Yeah. Hated it. Might be nastiest thing I've had to do. Met some really disgusting scum."

"But she doesn't do it any more," Detective Hairus assured Judy. "And no panther hookers in Zootopia. Nyte here put so much fear into the johns none of them would ever ask a panther for sex."

"You're going there," threatened Nyte.

"Going where?" Judy asked.

"Why don't you get out of the car," the panther suggested. "I don't want any witnesses when I discuss the issue with cement head here."

The bear just laughed. "Fundamental difference of opinion. Nyte here is soft on hookers. Don't think she's ever arrested one. More likely to buy them a meal or refer them to a shelter for abused females. I say arrest the hookers and there won't be any more johns."

"The hookers are victims. They need help."

"Half of them need money for drugs. They can get clean in jail."

"And the half that aren't on drugs? And the majority are abused. You want to lock up abuse victims?"

"Well getting the johns off the street won't solve their problems."

"No, but letting them stay in abusive situations won't solve their problems either. Their problems need a better solution than– We're here."

They parked at the old brass factory. Four officers were already there, the squad cars and a black maria for transporting prisoners were parked on the other side of the large building. Nyte and Hairus took their positions, out of sight, and ten minutes Judy began loitering on a section of sidewalk.

It didn't take long before a nice car pulled over. "You're new here, aren't you?"

"Yes."

"What do you charge?"

"For what?"

Judy found the suggestion disgusting.

Twenty minutes later a battered pickup truck pulled to the curb. The jaguar had a suggestion which Judy suspected, given their relative difference in size, would have been anatomically impossible and offered a bonus that sounded impossible for anyone driving such a wreck.

Judy couldn't be certain how many of the propositions were linked to the fact she was a rabbit, but many clearly were.

A van of smalls pulled over, and three jerboas, a hamster, and a gerbil – students at Rodentia Tech – made the most degrading request of the morning.

* * *

At noon Judy joined the backup crew for a sandwich and mediocre cup of coffee.

"You're doing great!" Detective Gannon assured her. "The professor and banker were the best catches, in my opinion. You're doing better than Nyte did when she was the decoy."

"Not a competition," the panther growled.

"I really don't like this," Judy complained.

"Did I order wrong? I thought you said you wanted–"

"Not the sandwich. This decoy job. Is this really how other animals see rabbits – oversexed and willing to do... A couple of those... I don't know if I can do this."

Detective Nyte put an arm around the rabbit. "You can do it. You're tough. Damn it, you and the fox solved the Night Howler thing all by yourselves. You took out the three bears! You–"

"Those were all physical. This is different. This is like an attack on my worth. I'm being asked to do things because I'm a rabbit."

"It's not because you're a rabbit. Any female out there would hear the crap you're hearing. And some of them have to do it to eat."

"You hear those things when you were the decoy?"

"Sure."

"All of them?"

The panther hesitated. "Okay, you're hearing some stuff... Probably because you're a rabbit. Stereotypes... Well, you know."

Judy almost chuckled, "Easy when they're your own. When I met Nick I thought he... When animals look at you and don't see you, just a stereotype, it's hard. I don't know if I can last the rest of the shift."

Lylah patted her back. "Do your best. You're tough, it's just a different tough than you usually use.

* * *

Duke Weaselton stood at his table with bootleg DVDs when an opossum sidled up to him. "Anything for me?"

"Whatta ya want?"

"Match for the cig, and a job."

Duke flicked the flame to life on a lighter and the possum leaned in to light the smoke. "Willin' to woik fer smalls?"

"If it pays."

"It is CD."

"Her? I dunno? They say the Chels is dangerous."

"Dangerous to cross. Dis is simple stuff. She needs a short fer some deliveries. Ten creds finder's fee if youse takes it. Seventy-five if youse gets a steady from it."

"What am I delivering?"

"I did not ask, and youse should not either. Dis is important, youse ever work for Big?"

"No, why?"

"Miss D does not like Big, and should she believes youse is a spy for Big the both of us mights go the way of Horseshoe Charlie."

"Whatta I do to get the job?"

"Canvas Sachs on Fifth at four. Tells 'em Duke sent ya."

"Thanks."

"Anythin' interestin'?"

"Rabbit working Clover."

"A rabbit?"

"Yeah, but I got no dough, so–"

The weasel let out a string of curses.

"What's the matter?"

"Hook MacKenzie's territory. And he ain't got no rabbits in his stable."

"Maybe he added one. Even if he didn't, no skin off your nose."

"Or maybe some stupid bunny off the farm don't know she is trespiring. An' if she or an equivocally stupid pimp winds up dead. Da police is all over da area, and dey is not conductive to my business interests. Watch my table, if youse sells somethin' I takes the commission off what youse owes me fer implodment."

"What are you gonna do?"

"Tell da bunny to get her cotton tail off Clover."

"Suggest she go to Acorn and Seventh. I might have a little dough after deliveries."

Duke realized something was odd as he approached Clover. There were usually two or three females out in what was euphemistically known as the 'entertainment district'. He saw a single female, a rabbit. And she looked like... Duke rubbed his eyes and squinted hard. Perhaps it was the distance. Perhaps it was the fact he didn't actually know many rabbits, which made him imagine this one resembled the one he knew best. Or maybe... Duke grinned. This was his chance to ruin her day.

The look of depression and desperation on Judy's face was real, not acting. She just wanted the assignment to be over so she could curl up under a rock and die. Was this really how all other animals saw rabbits? Was she as guilty herself, did she look at other species and only see stereotypes and not individuals? And the way she had thrown herself at Nick? No wonder he hadn't thought she was serious. This had to be the most miserable day of her life.

And as she thought her day could not possibly get any worse she saw Duke Weaselton striding confidently in her direction, a broad grin on his ugly face.

"Just go away," she suggested softly. No point in shouting the fact this was a sting.

"No, youse unfortunate creature. I is here to share da news of hope! Dog loves youse an' has a waterfall plan for yer wife!"

Judy hissed, "Go away."

"No. Hall-ah-Luigi, I is gonna share da woid of life wit' youse. Youse turns to Dog an' everythin' gets hunky or dory for youse real fast. It is because da big guy loves da refuse of da earth – it is why he made so many of–"

"Go away!" Judy told him louder.

"No. It is my dooty to help youse up, to lifts youse from da stain and degradable contortion into which youse is fallen and restores youse to–"

"Knock it off, weasel," Lylah Nyte advised, emerging from concealment. "I'm running you in for interfering with the police."

"Interfering? I offers spiritual subsistence to a fallen female and I am to be charged wit' a crime? Woik wit' me here, Defective Nyte, and we can saves dis–"

"You little–," she snarled. "You know this is Detective Hopps."

The weasel appeared to look closer at the rabbit, and with a shocked voice agreed, "Youse is right! How da mighty is fallen! From city hero to walkin' the streets. I still stands by the promiscuous of redumption which is fer all who believes. Hall-ah-Luigi!"

"And if blasphemy were a crime I'd also be charging you with–"

"You're not charging him with nothing," Hairus told her as he ambled over.

"He was interfering with police business!"

"I heard him too. What you know is going on in his head doesn't count in court. He didn't offer nothing for nothing – not a damn thing we can charge him with." Hairus looked at the weasel, "You're asking us to believe you got religion all of a sudden?"

"Amen. I is a deacon in da Foist Church of Dem that Helps Demselves."

"Where does this congregation meet?"

"A pool hall, an' we is growing."

"Can we arrest him for impersonating a deacon," Nyte asked hopefully.

"There is nothing we can do. Nothing to him anyway. Hey, he's like you – wanting to help a hooker."

"You shut your mouth," she snarled.

"And Duke will spread the word like a case of the measles. We may as well call the backup and tell them we're done for the day."

"So Officer Hopps is not fallen into a life of sin?" Duke grinned. "Hall-ah-Luigi!"

Nyte took a step toward the weasel, and the weasel took three fast steps back. Hairus held up an arm to block his partner. "We need to go," the bear told Nyte. "And Hopps is looking sick."

The panther looked down at the rabbit, "C'mon Judy. It was a rough day, but it's over now."

The weasel gloated as the three retreated. The bear probably didn't mind the job being over early – unless they stuck him with some new assignment when they got back to the First. The females were dedicated, and he felt certain they resented quitting early. He was only half right. Judy Hopps experienced the odd sensation of feeling grateful to Duke.

 _"Was dis a coincidental?"_ Duke wondered. _"Da sting bein' here on Clover... I doubts it... Nyte wanted Hook MacKenzie to puts in his nose. She wants his hide."_

The weasel analyzed the situation in terms of his own best interest. It was clear, to him, that Detective Nyte had her sights set on bringing in the wolverine. That information should, in theory, make 'Hook' MacKenzie willing to slip Duke a nice wad of gratitude for the warning. On the other hand, rumor was that Hook was more likely to beat information out of someone than offer financial reward. In addition Hook was a thoroughly nasty piece of work. Duke suspected the police didn't realize just how nasty the wolverine was, or they'd be making more effort to bring him in. Not that Duke planned to inform the police of anything, no profit in it. And if Hook wasn't sentenced to life, or if he escaped, he would come looking for the informant.

Or the wolverine would come looking if he could. The hook that took the place of his left paw counted as a weapon, and he would resist arrest. Maybe Nyte wouldn't leave enough that anyone would have to worry about MacKenzie.


	2. I Must Have Used the Wrong Line

Boilerplate Disclaimer: The various characters from the movie Zootopia are all owned by Disney the great and powerful. All registered trade names property of their respective owners. Cheap shots at celebrities constitute fair usage.

"Right Place Wrong Time" Dr. John, 1973

 _I been in the right place but it must have been the wrong time_  
 _I'd have said the right thing but I must have used the wrong line_

 **I Said the Right Thing, But I Must Have Used the Wrong Line**

Nyte glanced into the back seat of the patrol car on the drive back to the station, and saw Judy curled up and looking miserable. "Pull over at Water Hole Number Three," she ordered her partner, "the rabbit and I are getting out."

"But–"

"Do it. For once you can write up the damn report."

In the bar Judy protested, "I'm not a drinker," as Nyte put a glass of whiskey down in front of her.

"Medicine," the panther told her, "Doctor Nyte's orders. Two of these and you'll feel better. Maybe one will be enough for a short. You need something to take the edge off the day."

Judy used both paws to hold the glass. She sat with her legs stretched out on the seat of the booth and leaned back against the wall. "I've never felt so... so... I'm not even sure how I feel, it's like I'm almost ashamed to be a rabbit."

"No you're not. You're proud to be a rabbit. You're proud to be a cop."

"Not at the moment."

"Yes, you are. It was a rough day. They happen. You're not going to make headlines as the rabbit who saved the city every day. The job isn't easy, but you wanted it, and worked damn hard to get it. Why?"

"Why?"

"Yeah, why did you chose to be a cop. Your parents push you into it?"

"No," Judy smiled, took a drink of the whiskey and coughed violently. "They didn't want me to join the force."

"So why did you join?"

"I wanted to help other animals."

"Lot of ways to help others. We don't always meet the nicest animals in Zootopia. Sometimes we... You really got stuck with meter duty your first day?"

"Yep."

"Well, somebody has to do it. And they didn't know you were going to save the city, did they?"

Judy managed her first laugh since her shift started. "And today was helping others?"

"Sometimes it's a little easier to see the good we do than other times. You did fine, first time doing this is the worst. You learn not to take it personal. What the johns say to you is a reflection of who they are, it has nothing to do with who you are."

"Thanks," Judy told her, and took a sip of whiskey. "I needed that."

"Whiskey or the advice?"

"Advice more than the whiskey. You like this stuff?"

"Acquired taste. Now sip slowly and tell me when you decided to become a cop... And, which do you think pissed off your parents more, becoming a cop or dating a fox?"

* * *

Nick wondered if the revulsion his stomach felt was mirrored on his face as he took a sip from the mango, wheat grass, chia seed smoothie. Maybe he should have followed the example of the wolf and simply had a pomegranate seltzer. The select task force on small integration into the police department had wrapped up their preliminary planning and celebrated by going out for a drink. But given the allergies and preferences of the task force members the More Healthier Nature Bar was the only option that remained possible.

Regular consumption of the vile smoothie was supposed to add seven years of life. But, to Nick, it appeared it would be a longer life filled with pain and misery. He'd rather have a cold cider and put up with Doc Wheeler, the forensic pathologist, listing all the nasty things alcohol did to his system.

The fox felt relief that this portion of the work was done. Whether anything would come of it was largely out of his paws, but he felt they had created a solid plan. He raised his glass in a toast, "Well done. You all did great work."

"It'll never be accepted," the goat grumbled. The goat, a retired instructor at the police academy, was the most pessimistic individual Nick had ever met. But he'd been important to the task force. He pointed out flaws in plans that needed to be addressed. A grudging, "It might work," was high praise from the goat.

"It'll be accepted, it has to be. It's great!" the mouse insisted. She was the polar opposite of the goat, and Nick considered her something of a mouse version of Judy. It was a comparison Amie would have found flattering. She, like the other two smalls on the task force had dreamed of joining the police force. She served as a dispatcher for the Fourth Precinct, and Nick guessed she might have been assigned to the task force so the politicians could say, 'Of course there was a female on the the study.' While few of Amie's ideas were in the final recommendation report her enthusiasm had encouraged others to find solutions. Amie idolized Judy, without having met her, and wanted to be the first mouse to graduate the Police Academy.

Doc Wheeler and a second hamster, an EMT, furnished the largest number of recommendations.

Despite Nick's ability to read character the wolf, a street officer from the Second, remained a mystery. He was either a cheerful idiot or a shrewd motivator. Like Amie, few of his suggestions appeared verbatim in the report. But when the group hit snags the wolf sometimes proposed solutions so asinine they were absurd, but his willingness to express wild ideas encouraged others to think outside the box as well, and some problems had been neatly solved by approaching them from other than the usual angle.

Bogo... Nick still wasn't sure how to feel toward Bogo. The fox still nursed some resentment to the buffalo for his early treatment of Judy. But Bogo regretted the actions and had apologized. If Nick had been tempted to use his position on the task force to humiliate Bogo in any way the fox had also kept in mind that, back at the First, the buffalo out-ranked him. The captain had been valuable for raising issues the others might not have considered, and the report wouldn't have been as good without him.

If there was any animal on the task force whose worth Nick undervalued it was his own. Clashing egos would have insured failure despite the best efforts of Amie's cheer-leading if Nick had not been there to spread oil on troubled waters and keep progress moving forward. He kept the discussions clear, and free of personal animosity, complimented good ideas, comforted the occasional bruised ego, and made sure every animal's voice was heard during planning. While he might have undervalued his own efforts the others didn't.

"How long do you think until the first small class at the academy?" Amie wanted to know.

"We got to get this past the Accountability Commission first," Nick reminded her.

"That will be simple," Bogo insisted. "Hard part will be getting smalls to buy in. My guess is that will kill it."

"Nick and I have arranged a meeting with the small bosses in three weeks," Doc Wheeler told them.

"Seriously?" demanded the wolf.

"Seriously. Nick has some ideas to bring them on board. This could become real."

"Yeah, and if we never hear from you or the fox again we'll know the bodies will never be found," the goat predicted gloomily.

Nick coughed, "If I might finish. Assuming the Commission approves the report, and Doc and I can sell the bosses on the value of small police, and get funding–" The goat snorted his doubt. "I think we could run the initial pilot program to eliminate bugs in as little as three months, with six easily if things work."

"Can I be part of the testing program, and in the first class of recruits?" asked Amie.

"An animal can repeat the Academy, but not in the next session," the goat explained. "By that standard you could be in the first testing session, and as long as there was another test session you could be in the regular program." He shrugged, "But rules could be different between a testing session and the real program."

The task force chatted, and a personalized ring tone began playing. One of the animals had forgotten to mute a cell phone. Amie started to laugh and pointed at an embarrassed Nick.

"What's so funny?" demanded the wolf.

"It's the bunny hop," the mouse giggled.

Bogo advised, "Better take it," and Nick retreated from the table.

* * *

Back at Water Hole #3 Lylah Nyte had realized she made a mistake. "Give me your phone, I'm calling your fox."

In a quiet corner of the health bar Nick asked, "Judy? Whassup?""

"This is Nyte, I–"

"What's wrong? Is Judy okay?"

"Nice response, I–"

"Tell me, what happened? Why are you calling?"

"Bunny had a bad day, she–"

"How bad is it? Where is she? What hospital?"

"Your concern is touching, but you need to shut up a minute so I can–"

"Damn it, what's wrong! Where is she!"

"And I told you, shut up and let me finish. The preliminary damage was psychological more than physical, and–"

"Preliminary damage? Psychological?"

"Judy had a really bad day, lot of potential johns seeing a rabbit as a sex toy, and–"

"Bastards," Nick spat.

"You're kinder than they deserve," the panther told him. "Anyway, she was feeling lousy and I thought a whiskey might do her some good. Uh, your female is a light-weight..."

"You got her drunk?"

"I didn't mean to... Maybe she's not drunk. But she's close. I think she needs some TLC and called you."

"Where are you?"

"Water Hole Number Three, how fast can you get here?"

"Ten, fifteen minutes."

Nick excused himself from the others, grateful to leave the smoothie behind.

"Let us know how the Commission takes the recommendations," requested the wolf.

"For sure," promised Nick as he waved goodbye and headed for the door.

The goat shook his head in disbelief after the fox's departure. "I can't believe a rabbit can push around a fox like that."

"She's an unusual rabbit," Bogo told him.

Amie's opinion was, "I think it's very sweet."

"You think everything's sweet," the wolf reminded her.

"Not him," insisted the mouse, and pointed at the goat. Even the goat joined in the general laughter.

* * *

Twelve minutes later the panther turned custody of Judy over to Nick. "Uh, word of advice?" Nyte offered

"Don't let her go to a bar with you?"

"Hey, I didn't know she'd get plastered. No, it's... The day she had? Sex is not what she needs."

"I wouldn't take advantage of her while she's drunk."

"I not dunk," Judy giggled.

"You are," Nick and Nyte told her.

"No," the panther clarified, "I mean that after the day she had you just need to be tender. Don't touch her unless she wants to be touched. She's had animals talking to her like she was a worthless object. Treat her like someone of value."

"I do," Nick assured her.

"He do," Judy seconded with a hiccup.

The panther grinned, "Maybe you're okay, for a fox."

"Not going to give you my opinion of you just now."

"Not my fault she can't handle her liquor."

Nick got Judy back to her apartment and laid her down on the bed. A nap was probably good, but he decided she needed some nutrition and liquids to minimize tomorrow's hangover. And that required a call for technical assistance.

"Hello?"

"Suze? Nick here. Got a small crisis and–"

"Judy okay?"

"Not really, she's kind of drunk at the moment."

"She's a light-weight! What were you thinking!"

"Wasn't me! A large detective wasn't thinking. You can't trust felines. Anyway, I'm thinking she needs some food before I tuck her in for the night."

"Good idea– Do you have a picture of her?"

"A picture of her?"

"Yeah, drunk. Can you take one and send it to me?"

"And let you forward it to your parents? No way!"

"I won't send it to Mom and Dad, just threaten her with doing it."

"I repeat, no."

"And you want me to help you?"

"I'm asking you to help your sister."

"Fine, if you're going to be that way about it, I'll help... Carrot puree with radish and a bit of onion... Yeah, perfect. She probably has everything in the fridge and her spice drawer."

"Spice drawer?"

"Don't you watch her cook?"

"I watch her, not where she keeps the eye of newt or tongue of frog."

"It's not magic. Get a piece of paper and something to write with, I'll give you directions."

"Any chance you can come and make it yourself?"

"Gotta book. It's so simple even a fox can do it."

Nick looked around the kitchen an hour later. He'd clean up after he put Judy to bed. He wondered how the rabbit could cook a full dinner and leave less mess than he'd made on a simple pot of soup.

Except it had been anything but simple. How much is a 'pinch' of rosemary? Was a tablespoon a spoon one used at the table, or was it some sort of specific measure? 'Simmer'... Exactly what is a 'simmer'?

* * *

Nick woke Judy up and helped the protesting rabbit to the couch.

"I feel awful!"

"You're drunkover. You need something good in your tummy to reduce tomorrow's hangover." He gave her a large mug.

Judy sampled the contents of the mug. "You said I needed something good," she complained.

"Suze said you loved pureed carrot and radish soup."

Judy stared at the mug, "Did you use cherry belle, white beauty, or daikon?"

"What?"

"Three kinds of radishes I had on hand."

"There's more than one?"

"That explains why... Sorry, in a lousy mood."

"So I noticed. But I'll admit I'm not much of a cook." He held up his cell phone, "My favorite cooking utensil. Ten delivery places on speed dial. If I feel like healthy eating I use one of the seven take-outs, and walk there to pick it up."

Judy sipped from the mug and remembered how other animals had treated her that morning because she was a rabbit. "Would you love me more if I wasn't a rabbit?"

"You are a rabbit."

"That wasn't the question. Would you love me more if I was a different animal?"

"Do I get my choice? Can you be a giraffe? I love you the way you are. Why are you asking a silly question?"

"You don't think I'm sex crazy, do you?"

"No. Crazy, yes. Sex crazy, no."

"You think I'm crazy?"

"Well, the evidence does suggest the possibility. I mean, you did fall in love with a fox. That doesn't count as normal rabbit behavior."

"And the fact you're in love with me?"

"Not only are you crazy, but you're contagious. You infected me. Oh, I think I can make your day better."

"I don't think you can do anything to make this day better for me."

"How about I ask you to marry me?"

"You're serious?"

"Quite serious. Will you marry me?"

"No."

"No?"

"No. That's a pity proposal. You're asking me to marry you because you feel sorry for me. That's the worst reason to propose. I mean, that's worse than asking a female to marry you because she has money."

"You have money?"

"No, I'm saying that asking someone to marry you because she has money isn't as bad as proposing out of pity."

"I don't feel sorry for you, I love you."

"And someday, when someone asks how you proposed I'll answer, 'The day Nick proposed was the worst day of my life'. How will that sound?"

"Pretty funny actually."

"No it won't. You're only asking because I had a bad day. If the day had been fine you wouldn't ask."

"That's not true! Maybe it's not true... I've been thinking about it for awhile. My mother told me I should ask you to marry me and–"

"Your mother?"

"Yeah, when we went to Fox Ridge she–"

Judy groaned, "You found something worse than a pity proposal – asking a female to marry you because your mother told you to ask her."

"I'm asking you because I love you and want us to be together."

"You're still lousy at asking someone to marry you!"

"I haven't had a lot of practice. The only time I've asked someone to marry her she shot me down."

"Who did you propose to?"

"You, just now. You don't remember?"

"My head hurts too much. Look, I have nothing against marriage. But I can't accept a proposal today–"

"Can you pencil me in for a week from Tuesday?"

"Not funny. I'm just saying you can do better than asking me when I'm feeling miserable, nursing a hangover, and claiming your mother told you to propose."

"Is this going to be another of those crazy things like first kiss, where you demanded the perfect moment?"

"No... I guess it sounds like that, doesn't it. Sorry."

"That is certainly what it sounds like... Oh! I have an idea."

"And?"

"I proposed to you, you turned me down. It's your turn. You have to propose to me when you feel up to it."

Judy yawned, "Females don't propose to males."

"And rabbits don't become police officers, and they certainly don't fall in love with foxes. You have always shown a total disregard for social norms. Why stop now? You invite me out to an expensive restaurant to impress me, as we eat dessert the strolling violinist comes to our table playing 'Some Enchanted Evening' and you go down on one knee and offer me an engagement ring."

"I should have said yes when you asked me, shouldn't I?" she yawned again, and her eyes began to close as she cuddled up to the fox.

"You should have. Too late now." He waited for the rabbit to reply, but she said nothing. She didn't wake up when he carried her to the bedroom and put her to bed.

A nightmare woke Judy up in the middle to the night. In the dream Nick deserted her for a vixen he met on-line. She awakened with a sense of panic, and found his arm protectively over her. She smiled and tried to sort out the holes in her memory. She had gone into a bar with Lylah, who ordered a large-sized whiskey for her. They had talked... And her next memory was Nick shaking her shoulder to wake her up. She had been in her own bed. The next part was a little fuzzy. He'd given her some mediocre soup... And she'd been too critical. He'd made it with love and she had not appreciated the effort. She promised herself she'd make it up to him. And then... He had proposed? She turned him down? Judy groaned, _"I'll never get drunk again, ever!"_ Had he then challenged her to propose to him? And she accepted? That had to be wrong... How drunk had she been? Could she accept his proposal in the morning? _"Oh, I know just how to propose to him!"_ The rabbit smiled and drifted back to sleep. She'd tell him in the morning how finding him in bed with her relieved her panic attack

–The End–


End file.
